On Sunday, April 9, 2017, our twin boys, Ezra Lee and Leo Allen, died. They were born stillborn, just a day shy of 21 weeks. Any stillbirth is tragic. Yet, this loss was particularly painful, because this was supposed to be our double rainbow, the much awaited and longed for babies after we had already endured four early miscarriages within two years. Now, we are simply trying to put one foot in front of the other.Read More The Purpose of This Blog
Just before midnight on Sunday, April 9, 2017, our two sons, Ezra Lee and Leo Allen, died. Yet, their lives saved my own life. This is the heroic story of their birth.Read More Our Stillbirth Story
As we start the next step in the journey to create our family, we are facing new challenges. Learn more how you too can join us on our journey.Read More Join With Us On Our Journey
What do we do with unanswered prayers? Patrick wrestles with this question in his latest sermon. Why did God not save Ezra and Leo as we cried out to God to save them?
Yet, maybe our prayers have been answered in an unexpected way, as Patrick shares how, through one powerful interaction with a prisoner at a maximum security prison, God opened our eyes to a new path to parenthood – adoption.Read More Answering Unanswered Prayers
As we enter Advent, the season of waiting for the Christ child, Presbyterian Outlook is sharing the stories of parents who bear the grief of infertility, pregnancy loss and infant loss. As a part of this series, Presbyterian Outlook graciously asked Patrick to write a reflection on stillbirth from a father’s perspective. Read this, as well as the stories of other parents who have endured the pain of grief, in this remarkable series.Read More See me: A father’s perspective on stillbirth
This Advent, as Jenna and I remember the children we lost and dare dream of the Child to come, we are excited to announce that our own manger may one day be full. We have started the adoption process!Read More An Advent Announcement: We’re Adopting!
In my job, as I support the families of organ donors, I bear witness to the pain of indescribable human suffering every day. Where is God when the suffering of this life feels so senseless? Where was God when my own sons died?Read More Finding Comfort in the Senselessness of Suffering
The world of grief feels like a parallel universe, an Upside Down underworld that one must journey through to reach “Acceptance.” But is Acceptance truly accepted in the Land of the Living? Or is there another place where both darkness and light, both pain and peace can live together?Read More The Upside Down, Alternate Reality of Grief
Even in the face of death, it is easy to lose perspective and forget the miraculous wonder of everyday life. Rediscover this with me as I explore the tension of grief and gratitude that I have felt on this journey.Read More Grief and Gratitude